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Brian Kwong Salesforce WizardMark Ross Salesforce Yoda

WizardCast Happy Holidays 2017 Episode 58

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Happy Holidays 2017

We want to wish everyone a happy winter holiday. Merry Christmas, Happy Hanukkah, Joyful Kwanzaa, Winter Solstice, and any other holiday you celebrate that I didn’t include.

This year, the Salesforce Team beat us to the bunch for parody carols (Thanks Lauren Kemp). So instead of singing like we did in 2015 and 2016, this year we have something extra special.

So with apologies to Clement Clarke Moore:

Twas the night before Dreamforce

‘Twas the night before Dreamforce, when all through Moscone
Not a creature was stirring, not even a pony
The booths were set up in the zones with such care
In hopes that many prospects soon would be there

The Admins were nestled in their sleeping bags
While visions of Astro danced in their heads
And Duarte in her shiny shoes and I in my hat
Had just settled down for a pre-dreamforce nap

When out of the dev zone there arose such a clatter
like Charlie Isaacs’ alarms and their IOT chatter
Away to the doors I flew like a bird
Then tore open the doors to see what I’d heard

The DJ was playing much music so loud
with a flash mob of Admins that would make Erica proud
When, what should I see surrounded by fans
But Parker Harris dressed up as Lightning Man

He laughed as he demo’d what Lightning could do
So fast and so easy! You should all launch it too!
He pointed and gestured at Einstein and said
“Work Smarter not Harder! Use AI instead!”

“Now Saasy! Now Chatty! Now Cloudy and Astro!
On Codey! On Appy! on Earnie and Blaze!
To the top of mount Trailhead, to the top of them all!
Now Trailblaze, Trailblaze, Trailblaze all!

We popped up our heads from the sleigh pulled in tow
Encouraging all people to go and learn Flow!
To the top of Moscone those mascots did fly
To parade on stage for the Admin keynote, Oh My!

And then, with a sprinkling, the confetti did drop,
From Gerholdt and Leah, it tumbled non-stop
It fell and it sparkled, it twinkled and shone,
Then out stepped Marc Benioff to the center stage zone

Dressed up smart in his suit, there was naught but applause
Which only grew when he read the Safe Harbor clause
He said “We all know it’s a forward looking statement”
As the dancers performed hula for our entertainment

Now Parker and Marc, yes they’re quite a pair
and we love as they banter, It’s a lovely affair
With flair and panache, they put on show and tell;
They showed us new features – and often to sell

Twas drinking and song at the great concert Gala
The artists put on an extravaganza
As the next morn we walked to our sessions bleary-eyed
We continued to learn, though our brains were quite fried

Then Parker returned for True to the Core;
And listened to all comers of what they hate and adore
PMs answered questions, but one at a time
The answers we love though sometimes not sublime

After three days, our Dreamforce, it drew to an end
Twas sad to say farewell to trailblazer friends
We learned and were wowed in each session and zone;
Content in the knowledge that our careers, we have Grown

Then Parker sprang to the sleigh, to the mascots he whistled
and away they all flew to their HQ official
but I heard him exclaim, ere he drove out of sight
Merry Salesforcemas to all, and to all a good-night!


Happy Salesforcemas everyone!


We need to hear from you folks! Share with us your tips, blogs, Salesforce Videos, and Salesforce jokes (no matter how bad). We want to share them with our large audience of 6 people! Email us at or click “Contact WizardCast” on the right of our show notes.

What question would you ask Parker Harris? Let us know!

It’s nearing time for our next Ideas Highlight! Know of an Idea on the IdeaExchange that could use some love and attention? Tell us!

You can also tweet to @MarkRoss__c or @Kwongerific with hashtag #WizardCast with a question or other submission.

Cherry (Instrumental Version) (Josh Woodward) / CC BY 4.0

Some sound effects & music provided by

Overlay music from Dream, Written by Di Evantile




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